Global Haiku Tradition
Millikin University, Spring 2002

Alexis Iffert

Alexis' Haiku



Haiku Fortune Cookies

For my haiku project, I decided to make fortune cookies and cleverly insert my haiku inside of them.

Originally, I had planned to simply put my already written collection of haiku inside of the tasty treats. However, my typical haiku were not written as fortunes in the least bit. Therefore, I wrote a whole new series of silly haiku and senryu based upon fortunes and predictions for the day.

After I finished writing my new haiku, I realized that they were all bad fortunes and could even be labeled as "warning" cookies. Nonetheless, I found them to be very entertaining and fitting to my haiku personality and proceeded with the baking.

My "fortune" haiku certainly do not follow the main guidelines and rules of writing haiku. However, I have come to realize that almost none of my haiku and senryu strictly follow the rules, one reason I find them most representative of my writing style. I hope you enjoy the cookies, Dr. Brooks! Attached is a copy of all of the new haiku I wrote for this project.

—Alexis M. Iffert

alone in the woods
bad idea

late afternoon
watch out
for puddles

don’t walk
in the grass
lawnmower man

careful walking
beneath the trees
bird shit

overgrown weeds
watch out
for the dog turd

study all night
impossible final

run quickly
for your life
squirrel attack

careful on the crosswalk
speeding car
runs a red

screeching tires
your body
makes a thud

don’t pet
the friendly dog
he’s rabid

bring Kleenex
to your next class
unexpected nosebleed

careful who you kiss
herpes virus

take the stairs
in Shilling
elevator jams

chicken patties
in Wornick

cute little puppy
poops in your lap

no more chocolate
bad case
of the runs

watch out
for stray cats
they bite

peeping over
someone’s paper
caught by the teacher

©2002 Randy Brooks, Millikin University, Decatur, Illinois || all rights reserved for original authors